Due Back

Due Back is when an offshore worker had completed his time off. Its the 'back-to-work' time. It can be sort of a sad parting from family & friends, but it also can be exciting since the barge may had moved to another country since last you left it. Another free ride to a foreign country. For me, my time off is 3 weeks after that I am due back for 6 weeks offshore on every trip.

Going back offshore is obviously the opposite of going home for time off. You have to make sure you have all the things you need & all packed nicely in the luggage. Most importantly of course is making sure your passport & travel documents are all in order. One thing in mind is on working permits or visa to work in a foreign country, its always good to double check whether you were given an ERP or EPO when you first left the barge to return home. ERP or Exit Return Permit would mean that you will still have a valid entry to that foreign country upon arrival & the agent do not have to re-apply a new one for you. However, ERPs does have a time limit, some 2 - 4 weeks & some 1 - 2 months, or more so if you were on a very long time off, a new application is needed and that would take a day or so to complete in the country you are going to. The EPO, or Exit Permit Only, would means your previous working permit or visa is void and a new application is needed.

Like any other travelers, arrival can be a real bitch sometimes when time is involved. For this, I make sure that I am well prepared for this mentally & I do this by knowing beforehand what I am suppose to do and where I am suppose to go after I had landed in the airport. Rushing from one point to the other is something I've gone accustomed to now as an offshore worker. Also, orders from the office can change sometime & it can be beneficial or it can really be a pain in the arse. Why? Well it all depends. Staying a night or two because of unforeseen circumstances like rough weather at sea, crew boat not ready, need to re-apply working permit or just waiting for the rest of the crew to arrive from various different countries, for example, can give you the time to have a look around the city in which the country you are in. Its like an extended time off. Of course the set back is, you will also be adding that extra few days offshore. You see, your time on the barge offshore starts to tick only at the moment you arrived to the barge and not on the way to the barge. So weigh it for yourself and decide if the wait if beneficial or not. Have the extra 2 days waiting to go on the crew boat & walk around Singapore and then go home 2 days late when you are due for time off? Hmmmmm...Like I said, depends on the individual.

To travel to the work location or field, we use a crew boat. The trip itself varies depending on the location of the barge at sea. For this trip, it took us 16 hours from Batam, Indonesia to the Natuna Sea in the South China Sea. Sounds far right? Well, of course it is. But luckily, the crew boat we were in has the speed of 22 knots and it could be more than 16 hours if the crew boat was slower. In one occasion, it took 32 hours to reach the location. This is also categorized under travel time and will not be included in the offshore time. It can be boring to go on really long crew boat run but it does not mean you are not taken care off. Snacks and drinks are readily supplied on-board and it's always enough for everyone. Sleeping space however will not be as comfy as your bed and when meeting rough seas, always make sure you got a supply of anti-seasick pills. I have to admit, no matter how long I have been in and out of the sea, the danger of getting seasick is always lurking around the corner. Seasick is not fun.

And then, its back to work in the deep blue sea again. Also, upon arrival, you will usually meet up with the other personnel you are relieving with a quick hand shake and a simple bon voyage message. Of course, this is when the days start counting..

TiMeOFF

Timeoff...this is the best part for an offshore worker. Its the going home part. This may sound like a normal daily-routine to most of you land-lubbers but to us, after being surrounded by the sea for 6 weeks or more, the well deserved rest we call as TiMeOff, is something we really look forward to.

The deal I have for me is that I have to stay on-board and work for 42 days (6 weeks) and get a time off for 21 days (3 weeks). That's the deal I have with the company I am working for. It's a pretty darn good deal too. In total, I have 102 days for time off in a year..unlike you land-lubbers, you probably have 21 days of official leaves in one (1) year..right? Well, I am REQUIRED to take leaves for 21 days every time I have completed my 42 days. And yes, I still get paid when I go home for leaves (time offs). All this is because some clever cunt thinks that if someone stays at sea for more than 60 days, it can effect the person's psychological state. On certain oil field areas offshore, like Brunei as one example, you are required to sign a form to declare that it is at your own will that you had decided to stay longer than 60 days at sea. To mE..this is my time off.

What do I feel about...it is exhilarating. I know I am gonna be fucked up with a lot off booze and a lot of waking up to do. Like really late in the morning to catch up with another day of boozing cum family gatherings and social interactions. Its when I am going to do the normal things I did when I am a land-lubber :)


Hehehe..I am just wondering what I'll be writting for the next farkin' 3 weeks. In fact, I have nothing much to vent while I am on time off, no frustrations and anger...I just want it to be peaceful and to put the cherry on top, drunk... need I more? I do have a good family and a good wife, other than that its nothing much to worry about when I get home...its just rilexsssssss...now. In my mind right now is, hmmm..42 days at sea and then 21 days for time off. Fuck me, I am enjoying it and sticking to this deal for a certain amount of favorable time-lAh!

So take it from me, time offs are something we really look forward to when you are an offshore worker. To me, basically its farkin' Linkin Park, Paramore and Cyprussssss Hills...

The going home part can be a real pain sometimes though. In my case, 21 days starts counting down from the day my foot left the barge to go to back to shore on a crew boat. Sometimes I find myself lucky when it only takes 4 hours back to shore via a crew boat. - I'll be home on the same day. The worst case scenario came to me once when it took 16 hours from the location of the barge to shore. Ouch! I loose 1 day because of that. In this scenario, it is called Travel Time taken for a subject to leave the barge and reach home. Airport scenarios come after that. So its taxi to hotel first, stay a night, taxi to airport and fly home the next day. By now the count is about 3 days. The further an offshore worker goes from homeland, the further distance he have to recover to go back home. For me, I suppose I can say that my 21 days of time offs is more expensive than GoLd. Well, such are our worries..but usually though, the painstaking homeward bound journey isn't that bad. So far, I have been home on the same day I left the barge. These operations are taken care of by some of the best Logistics personnel working as a branch to the main office at the country where the barge might be working.

Its a de-centralised unit from the mother company to take care of their personnel 's movements working over a foreign land. Who else will know about their country's rules and regulations other than the people already living there? From airflight, land transportation , hotel and crew boat arrangements, these guys know how to deal with it. Sounds familiar? Kinda like a tourist agency eh? Well, its kinda work like that..also, they do know customs and immigration laws that is being regulated in that country. Custom clearance is a bitch if you are to do this on your own..trust me. We leave this task to the Agents on the shore.

So no worries...you are after all heading home. Time to rilexs..Peace..

What You Should Bring When You Go Offshore

Travel Light! There’s no point bringing in your entire cupboard and kitchen sink. Packing up to go offshore should be as minimal as it can be and only the essentials should be nicely tucked in that luggage of yours. Here’s the MUST have list and why:

CLOTHES

I thought I should start with the obvious. The clothes you actually need on the barge should be in three pairs. Three pairs of T-Shirts or collar shirts, three pairs of underwear, three pairs of shorts/pants/jeans and three pairs of socks.

Of course, one of them pairs are the clothes you will be using when you travel to the barge and it will also be the same clothes when you get off from the barge to travel home later for time off – so make sure that pair is the ‘stylo-milo’ one. You don’t want to end up looking ancient in the airport with some worn-out clothes. In addition, you should always bring your coverall. One coverall is good enough.

Laundry is done twice daily for both day shift personnel and night shift personnel. It is taken care by the catering crew so you don't have to do it yourself. Even for those cunts with super clean habits, they can get their clothes washed up, dried, FOLDED and sent to their cabin everyday.

CHOCOLATE & MINT

Other than as a good snack, chocolate and mint can be a useful item to bring offshore. Although with all the good food on board, chocolate and mint is hard to come by. With it you can barter trade for something else, like a pack of ciggarettes and other items you might need or as a sign of appreciation to a co-worker when he helps you out with, for example, fixing your laptop problems, internet connectivity problems, urgent expenses claims or even for a piece of good advice. Your money is no good ON the barge - everything from food to laundry services are provided free here anyway.

FOREIGN CURRENCY

....of course before leaving home, you should have ready the right currency for the country you will be travelling to. I find it easier to have them ready at hand because of the rush I have to go through before I reach the final destination. Some offshore workers have to go through 3 transits and the wait can be between 30 minutes to 15 hours in the airport. With the right currency at hand you can skip the money changer hassle and rush to the nearest bookstore to purchase that new edition of FHM magazine.

Shavers and nail clipper is also a must. You should also make sure you bring 2 pairs of tooth brush. One is enough but you can never be sure that you will be going home on time as scheduled so that extra tooth brush will be a blessing at that sort of situation. Did I mentioned tooth paste...no? Ok, tooth paste too. Big ones.

As the accomodation on the barge is fully air conditioned, skin moisturising cream is another essential item you should bring. I know women usually uses these items, but when your skin starts drying up and your face feels like its going to tear everytime you smile, you will know that you need it. You find yourself starting to put a note like "Buy Nivea Moisturiser For Men - Next Trip" in your organiser. In fact, get the whole package, Facial Scrub, Facial Wash and Facial Moisturiser - All in one package which shouldn't cost more than RM100 - Get those written with "For Men..." so that you won't be too embarrased to pay for it on the counter. While you are at it, also take a bottle of Minyak Cap Kapak (Eucalyptus Oil).

What you DO NOT need to bring however are things like, a towel, a blanket, pillows and pillow cases, spoons, forks, knives, plates and soap - All these things are provided free on the barge. Not forgetting also, you do not have to bring any medicine or multivitamins which you can readily get from the Barge Doctor or Medic at the Barge Clinic. Cun eh...?

MOBILE PHONES AND LAPTOPS

Its always good to have these two technologies as your travel companion. But I have to put these two under the "see the circumstances" category. This is because some oil and gas companies allow them offshore while some like Shell and Petronas have a strict regulation against bringing them in. Well, if you can't then you can't. There's always the phone booth on the barge and also the iCafe. So, no worries if you can't bring them. Besides, its not rare that you will be 4 to 10 hours away from land by crew boat, you think you can find a handphone signal there?

Above Deck Crew & Below Deck Crew

I did mentioned about going into details on the different types of barges working in oil fields offshore but for now let me explain the two different categories of personnel on board a barge. Besides, I need more time to do some drawings on the barges to show you dumb duck land lovers what difference are there between each barges, graphically. So stay tune for that topic.

Basically, personnel working on the barge are separated into two categories. One is called Above Deck Crew and the other, Below Deck Crew. Lets start with the Below Deck crew, in which is the category where I belong.

The Below Deck crew consist of the following positions (in no order of heirarchy, we don't fuel Office Politics here):

• Barge Administrator (thats me...)
• Radio Operator (GMDSS Certified)
• Control Tower Operator
• HSE Officer
• Barge Doctor/Medic
• Chief Electrician/Barge Electrician/Electrical Technician
• Barge Mechanic
• Warehouseman & Storeman
• Catering Crew (Campboss, Western Cook, Asian Cook & Stewards)
• Marine Crew (Chief Engineer, Barge Master, Marine Captain, Chief Officer, 2nd Officer, 3rd Officer, Bosun & A.B.)

The Above Deck crew consist of the following positions (in no order of heirarchy):

• Barge Superintendent (my boss..)
• Welding Superintendent/Welding Foreman/Welder/Fitter Foreman/Fitter
• Barge Foreman & Barge Leaderman
• Rigger Foreman/Rigger Leaderman/Rigger
• Scaffolder Supervisor/Scaffolder Foreman/Scaffolder
• Derrick Crane Operator/Deck Crane Operator
• Field Engineers
• QA/QC Engineers
• ROV Supervisors/ROV Pilots/ROV Technicians
• Dive Superintendent/Dive Supervisor/Saturation Diver/Air Diver
• PFM / Line Up Operator
• Hammer Technicians

I guess that sums up almost all I can list down. I may have missed a few, but yeah, most of the major ones are listed. So, whats the difference then? Well, most importantly - expenses and budgets! The Finance people working on the shore have separate budgets for The Above Deck Crew and Below Deck Crew. Can't say I know much in detail, but my guess is to keep track a good budget and records. The more obvious diference is that the Above Deck Crew are those who will be working on the construction sites while the Below Deck crew are those who will be taking care of the barge's well being and keep things operational. Will get a write up done on some of the positions held on a barge on upcoming postings.

In addition, some of the Above Deck Crew may be required to change when the barge goes from one country to another. For example, we might have a Malaysian Field Engineer on board while working in Miri but when we moved to work in Indonesian waters, then we will get an Indonesian Field Engineer, and Thai Field Engineer when the barge goes to Thailand waters. You got the picture right? Below Deck Crew however, usually do not change no matter which country the barge goes.

Daily routine on a Barge

I must say that I have the best office in the world (not to mentioned the best job I ever landed myself with). I mean, where else can you be greeted by the beautiful sunrise as you go to work at the begining of the day and yet again catch the beautiful sunset at the end of the day. Smoking a ciggarette at the designated smoking area as the sun goes down, marking yet another good day had gone by. When they say 'Deep Blue Sea', out here is REALLY deep blue sea. Its quite common to catch sight of schools of fish as they swim gracefully around the barge and occasionally you will see dolphins feeding on them. Oh, the life out here is great...

Commuting is also one of the problem we don't face out here offshore. When working on land, I can say an average of one hour for someone to reach the office, maybe more for those who have to send their kids to school. Yes, I am sure you land lovers would have a list of excuses of why you were late this morning and I am sure they were 'valid' reasons too. I can't blame you really. Too many cars, too many dumb duck land lovers. For me, this picture on the right shows my 'highway' to the office. From my cabin, it takes 3 steps forward, a turn to the left, then 5 steps forward and a turn to the right...bingo! If all goes well, I should be reaching my office within 1 minute. On a heavy traffic day, when too many stupid cunts are standing around the hallway, it will take me 3 minutes. And that will be my office-rush day. My shift starts from 0700hrs and it ends at 1900hrs. The barge works 24 hours per day meaning a full 12-hour per day shift and a full 12-hour per night shift. Of course, shift times varies between different positions on the barge. For example, 1100hrs to 2300 hours, or 0600 hours to 1800 hours. Some even have VARYING hours and no definite shift time.

To have the full strenght and concentration for the next day, I would make sure I have the 8 hour sleep I need and wake up roughly around 0630 hrs every morning. I don't really bother going down to the galley for breakfast since I get breakfast sent to me in the office (for example, the picture on the left shows a beef steak sandwich I had for breakfast) and I have all sorts of hot drinks (Horlick, Milo, BOH teabags & Nescafe 3-in-1). I can have them all ready in the pantry...just in front of me in-fact. Most personnel who don't have this luxury of course wakes up a wee bit earlier than me and heads to the galley after showering and after changing to their coveralls. In the galley, you can have pancakes, the wide variaty of cereals, drink all you can fruit juices and hot drinks of choice, an occasional nasi lemak, nasi goreng seafood telur and mee goreng seafood telur.

When the clock strikes the hour, usually havoc of the daily work on a barge will start. During a busy day, well..everyday is a busy day like any other, you can almost compare it to those people working with the stock exchange. I say this because good communication is pretty much needed between co-workers on the barge. Communications between the barge office and personnel working on the deck and vise versa is usually done by using a walkie-talkie. In fact, a Standard Horizon Submersible HX3705 VHF radio. Like what this gentleman is using. It doesn't work like a telephone call however and defnitely not as clear with all the noisy construction and machinery noises in the background. It takes practise to converse and listen with a walkie talkie. A mistake in communication can actually lead to someone's death out here. I am not kidding here, nor am I exhagarating. Communications with the outside world is by telephone and YES, we do have INTERNET on-board. We run a 100MB Broadband line using the VSAT technology which feeds enough power to transmit a long distance telephone call and post up this goddamn blog. Thank God for this too, I can't imagine how hard it was for someone to send a message across to shore a long-long time ago by using a TELEGRAM. What I know from my veteran brother-in-arms is that it takes 3 days for a telegram to reach the shore and an extra 2 days for the message to reach his family at home. But that shit was a long time ago, we have better shit now.

In addition to good communication, personnel working on the barge should have a SHARP mind. I said 'SHOULD' because some personnel here are really stupid cunts! This is particularly useful when decisions have to be made in a split second. Of course some one with a sharp mind, like myself, will always gets his facts and strawberry syrups ready way ahead before the day starts. Times equals money on the barge and the more some dumb duck takes his time to think of his choices to later decide on, the more US dollar is being wasted. In view of this matter, lets look at how SLOW land lover workers would be, for example processing a simple form can take from 1 day to a freaking year...right? Come on, give it up...you know I am right. You don't really give a shit too, besides how much can that form cost the company. The worst it can go is some poor fellow waiting for his car insurance renewed.

With all the special requirements like going off early to pickup children from school, groceries and bill payments, I can't really blame you really. We however, do not have that sort of specialty on that department. What could possibly we be needing to do out here in the middle of the sea other than work?

We also do not 'tai chi' our work to our co-workers around here unlike what some of you land lovers like to do in the office on shore. Even after our shifts are over, we make sure our part is completed PERFECTLY and we do something called a handover for 15 minutes or so and tell the personnel on the next shift what had happened today and what important follow-ups should be done. Office politics are hard to come by offshore and we don't intend to start one. We leave that glamorous work culture to the people working on the shore and think how much of a lame cunt they can be.

And this we do during our lunch and dinner time. Day shift personnel goes for lunch between 1000 hrs till 1200 hrs when the galley doors of heavenly food opens. The galley closes between 1300 hrs till 1600 hrs for cleaning and preparing food for dinner which is then between 1700 hrs till 1900 hrs. Night shift personnel would be having their breakfast at this time, then lunch at 2200 hrs and lastly dinner at 0500 hrs.

After shift and handover, a few things you can do..I might have to stress on the word 'a few' here since the options would be, wash up, watch TV (yes, we have satelite TV for each cabin - on a SAMSUNG flat screen TV), go to the gym (yes, we do have a gym on-board. Its free too, no membership fee), surf on WiFi at the I-Cafe or just writing this blog from my cabin in the middle of the sea. For me, I only have 4 hours to do these things for relaxation but not all of them in one single night. Of course then its sleep time and that strikes a day out from the calendar. Good night...cunts.